The Guardian

It breaks my heart every single time I learn that someone else has joined this loss community. The heart break that comes with it is so entirely unique that it’s difficult to describe, and that makes it harder to handle. How do you talk about something you can’t explain? Some days it feels like¬†looking through a waterfall – general shapes and colors, but nothing quite comes together. In all of this, there are little things that help me find some comfort as the days go on.

It may sound odd, but I like to think that Jonah is out there greeting each and every one of these children. He’ll run up to them and grab their hand to show them around, instantly making friends. They’ll play games together and take in the new additions to their world, giving them a community to belong to. He’d show them places to go to look down on us where they could see us the best, and those would be times that we can feel their presence with us. He’s their little guardian up in the heavens, keeping them company until we get to see them again.

I miss my son dearly but thinking of him as a protector and friend of all these other children gives me a feeling of peace. I would strive for him to be a man of principle if he were here with us – being an extension of the voice of reason when needed or a protector for his friends and family – and it’s easy for me to identify that with him in his place in Heaven. My son, the guardian.

Know that you’re in my prayers –¬†moms, dads, aunts and uncles, grandparents and cousins. You’re on my heart every day

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